Being in our body = Being open to love
While working as a humanitarian, I never realized how disconnected I was from my body.
It was only as I started practicing yoga and breathwork that I became aware of it.
As I grew this consciousness, I noticed all the tensions I was carrying in my body.
My shoulders were so tight. My solar plexus felt like a shield.
And indeed, this is what my body had become: an armor.
Faithfully protecting me from the perceived – and sometimes real – danger.
Working in emergencies, often in conflict environment, it made total sense.
Hearing fighting nearby. Seeing wounded and destructions. Expecting the worst.
I can now see how my body did its job very well.
It got me efficiently running operations, running on adrenaline.
And guarded.
Ready to fight or flight.
But this took a toll.
Building this armor meant disconnecting from my body.
From my emotions.
From a part of myself.
Today I see this with women I work with.
Humanitarians or not.
Their work involves responsibilities and stress, and leave them focused and tensed.
Such a tension affects their personal lives, their relationships.
Love and sex are about openness.
About receiving. Support. Pleasure. Love.
About our capacity to feel, to be moved.
About being vulnerable.
About surrender.
This require a different way of being.
Almost a different language.
We can learn this language.
We can switch from doing and tensing to being and opening.
This happens in our body, in our nervous system.
Befriending our body.
Unfreezing our sensations.
Allowing our emotions.
Trusting deeply.
